Atta Ikede

July 9, 2008

Facebook “friends”

Filed under: Uncategorized — attaikede @ 9:49 am

I unfriended a whole whack of people from facebook today. Who were these people? Highschool classmates who copied answers from me. Coworkers who I never talk to anymore. Etc. It’s fun to get reconnected with these people in the beginning – look at their photos, see what other mutual friends we have etc. But after the spying is over and done with, is there really a benefit to being connected with people like that?

What about people who are one step in — university classmates with whom I am completely out of touch with now. We weren’t friends when we were in school and didn’t become friends after we left. For now i’ve kept these people on my list mainly because if I desperately had to network with anybody, they’re the people I’d start with outside my actual friends. I mean, we did spend 5 important years together. That’s gotta count for something. But maybe I should be unfriending those people as well. Would I realistically reach out these non-friend classmates? More likely I’d reach out to my friend and ask my friend to reach out to the person I was trying to get at.

People talk about how networking is really important, but I wonder how useful holding on to these acquaintances is relative to just relying on your normal network of actual friends.

Charming people, or smooth talkers, or however you want to describe them are special because they can pretty much approach anybody and get what they want. I can see how it makes sense for such people to have Facebook friend lists of thousands of people. The rest of us aren’t so gifted. We (a) probably wouldn’t approach acquaintances and (b) if we did it would probably be awkward.

I’m starting to feel like after the initial spying/catchup phase is over having such people on facebook is just stressful. They can spy on my photos whenever they want, read what wall posts other people are leaving me whenever they want, etc. I dont want these people keeping tabs on my life!

If I use the security features then they know that I’ve limited their access and so that seems kind of weird too. Why friend somebody and then not let them contact me? Cutting them off seems like the best thing to do. That’s why i unfriended so many people today.
What about you guys? Some of you have reasonably sized friends lists (I think 100 and up starts getting kind of big). Do you really keep in touch with those people? do you restrict their access? Have you ever gone through and cleaned your list?



  1. It’s like our msn contact list, keep building up and there are only 10% of those you talk to “often.”

    Comment by picnic buddy — July 10, 2008 @ 8:20 am

  2. That’s why I only have about 2o something people on my facebook list – but even out of my little short list I can’t say I talk to everyone on it. It’s so true when they say there’s only a handful of people you actually keep in touch with after each phase in your life.

    Comment by rabbitdownunder — July 13, 2008 @ 9:17 pm

  3. true …

    Comment by attaikede — July 14, 2008 @ 8:18 pm

  4. I was actually thinking of doing this the next time I went on facebook!! LOL, notice I actully did clean it up a little for you?

    Comment by Lisa — July 22, 2008 @ 3:44 pm

  5. I did! :) Thanks :)

    AND I noticed the “lisa is in a relationship” tag. Details please! hmm .. i’m going to have to call you!

    Comment by attaikede — July 25, 2008 @ 6:26 pm

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